Waiting

Hey guys--

Right now, I'm just waiting.

I wish I could just skip the next day or two. It would instantly make my life 10x better.

My mom found all my alcohol. Or, at least I think she did. Some friends and I drank a bit on Thursday, and I didn't exactly put everything back to where it was supposed to go. The bottles were under my desk, and while my mom was helping me pack this morning, I'm pretty sure she caught a glimpse of them. Whenever my parents find out about something I do, they both migrate out onto the deck and begin yelling at each other. Of course, this happened shortly after my mom left my room. I'm not sure exactly where my parents were, but I was able to throw everything away, and now, all my empty bottles are hidden safely in a huge trash bag along with a bunch of other shit from around my room.

And I was just thinking how totally hilarious it would be if my parents read my blog.

HAHA

But yeah, hopefully all goes well and we can just put all of this behind us. Yeah... right. I mean, hopefully they never saw anything, and I'm just paranoid.

Last night was pretty shitty. I found out that I couldn't see Sebastian today-- we both had a lot of shit to do, I guess. So, after seeing Aaron for the last time, I went to see Sebastian in market square. I don't want to go into too much detail about the night, but to put it bluntly, I was completely ignored by him when he had the good knowledge to know that I was very upset and not to mention the fact that this would be the last time we would see each other. I'm probably overreacting, like I usually do. I just don't get him sometimes.

Well, I think it's time for me to leave here shortly. I'll be writing here more. Maybe daily? 

Thats funny considering the only person who reads this is Zara.

LOLZ HEY YOUUUUZ

I SEE YOU SOON? ;]

tight! 

You will all be hearing from me again! Wish me luck!

My Approaching Departure

Well- howdy folks.

It's been... about forever and a day since you've read about my totally compelling and interesting life. 

I'm leaving for Oxford, England this Saturday night at 9:31 PM. It's going to be a long red eye flight across the pond. And hopefully I'll be able to navigate my way through Heathrow alive. It's going to be the first time I'll ever do all that airport shit by myself. DANG. I'm going to get lost.

I keep on fantasizing about running away while I'm over there. I know it would probably be impossible and definitely not worth the consequences (but what is?) I still think it would be an amazing thing to do. I can just imagine running around Europe experiencing crazy adventures. But I suppose I have all my life to disappear like that.

I'm going to Oxford to study Military History and Law. Those seem to be some random subjects I've pulled out of my ass. I'm usually a Creative Writing, Drama, English person but I guess my tastes have changed. Either that or the little devil inside of my brain knows that those are manly classes, which hopefully will be filled with a bunch of manly men. Oh, my subconscious... always getting me into trouble.

I'll be staying in England for four weeks. I visited there, in Oxford, for three weeks two summers ago to do a less intense version of the program that I will be attending shortly. Oxford, I must admit, is the most amazing place in the world! It has your perfect mixture of big city experience, as well as the small town feel. I guess it reminds me of home a little bit... of course with a little more excitement, less supervision and a better accent.

I'm excited to be leaving. Last time I went, my peers there weren't too great. Maybe that's just 13 year old Jackie's opinion. I've changed a lot since then. Two summers ago, I was definitely not as good looking, as well experienced with the "ways of the world" and I was most certainly the most socially retarded person in the entire program. Things, hopefully, will be better on the social aspect.

I don't know how I'm going to be able to last six weeks without a cigarette... fuck.

It will be good for me. I'm determined to make the best of this.